“Being vulnerable is not weakness. It is an essential component to being human. It reminds me that what I have to offer others is of value. and that I matter as a person.” Tony Lapointe The whole “dating” thing is an interesting topic for me, especially because I for the most part completely suck at…
Articles by Tony Lapointe
Voices from the Past
“Today…I will not allow the voices of the past to control my present. I will remind myself that I am strong and resilient and that I deserve to be loved.” I have conversations routinely with men and women who struggle to let go of the shame they received from those they trusted most. These voices…
The Power of Being Seen
I’m sure when you sit back and reflect on your life, inevitably your thoughts turn toward someone who has had an impact on your life…sometimes good and sometimes not. When we talk about embracing authenticity, the focus has generally been about healing the broken parts of our selves and finding the strength to be genuine…
Embracing the Positive Self
I will admit that in my role of a counsellor, the focus of my conversations with clients is to resolve problems. To find ways to minimize, heal, or otherwise “deal” with issues in order to improve one’s quality of life. I am however constantly surprised when I remember that self acceptance also means accepting that…
From Agnostic to Christian to Atheist
The road to hell really IS paved with good intentions For some reason, and I’m not entirely sure why, but I’ve been meditating about the church of late. Mostly brought on by listening to 80’s Christian music! (I know, right?). I was raised in a largely agnostic environment. My mother considered herself Roman Catholic but…
Charting my own path
A deep sense of love and belonging is an irreducible need of all people. We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don’t function as we were meant to. We break. We fall apart. We numb. We ache. We hurt…
The contradiction of church
“Our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful parts of us.” – David Richo The church has played a significant role in my life, both good and bad. It provided structure to my life that was needed in order to discover who I am and at the same time, was instrumental…
The Fear to Love
“…it is the affirming love of another man that is the most effective antidote to the battered self esteem of most gay men in our society. And it is the love of another over time that provides the greatest certainty and clarity about one’s personal identity as a gay man. Only then does being gay become indispensable to one’s happiness.” Richard Isay, “Becoming Gay”
The Journey Home
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” C.G.Jung Three years ago, my home town of Portage la Prairie began having its own Pride March to celebrate LGBTQ citizens and to foster a sense of inclusion in the city. The first one was 2016 and when I saw it I was…
The Power of Loneliness
“Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life’s cruelest irony.” Douglas Coupland I wonder what, if any, role loneliness plays in true belonging. Can one truly belong and feel lonely at the same time or are they enemies of each other? I will admit that I…